Stainless Pans and Kitchen Lessons

When I was pretty close to the age of 12 I met a woman named Woody.  That wasn't her real name by any means, rather a 'bird name', which was a nickname given to staff at a local children's camp.  My dad had known her and her husband for a number of years through the camp. 

I hadn't seen Woody in almost thirty years until I realized that she attended the church that we began attending two years ago.  It has been fun to visit with her here and there, talk about camp experiences and people and know her as an adult rather than a teen.  

Anyway, one of the things that Woody did at camp was cook, which happened to be one of the things that my mom did as well.  

The kitchen at that camp is the stage where I learned many lessons alongside my mom.  I learned about Gordon Food Service products, which came in handy later when I scored my first job at none other than Gordon Food Service.  I learned how important it was to know the number of people you were preparing a meal for in order that no one was left hungry.  I learned the power of smell - there is nothing on this earth quite like the magical smell of freshly baked bread.  I learned which foods can be prepared or cooked ahead, the importance of  serving warm food, how to chop more veggies than you can count, how to divide portions and the importance of beginning early.  I learned a lot about working with other people and even more about washing dishes.  

Oh the dishes!  They are actually what bring me to this post.  

Last night our church had a potluck dinner that was a very sweet time of filling our tummies, meeting others and bragging on all that the Lord has done through our church in the past year.  

There was a lot of food left.  And, Woody, who is now a widow, asked if our family would use the remainder of the food that she brought.  She then pointed me to two humongous pans of food that I brought home, divided into smaller portions and began washing her pans to return to her.

It was in the process of washing and drying those pans that I realized that my mom used the same pans when preparing larger portions at home.  I can't tell you how many times I have washed a pan similar to Woody's after dining on one of my mom's meals.  I can't tell you how many times her pans fed a crowd whether it was a family dinner or a large event she had planned.  

It humbled me to realize that I learned so much from my mom while working over pans just like those.  The conversations that stainless pans could tell - you know, if they were intelligent rather than being just a well formed hunk of steel.  

Some days I wonder if I miss my mom the right way.  If I miss her as much as I should.  If I'm doing this whole grief thing right.  My counselor laughed when I shared that with her recently - "Is there a right way?" she asked.  I told her that it felt like there should be a list of recognizable milestones and a place for check marks.  She offered to have me committed.

Just kidding.  

I know that such a chart doesn't exist for a reason and that everyone thinks, feels and experiences differently.  And if I had to say how I'm doing I would tell you that I'm doing pretty okay.  

Tonight I'm reflecting on the similar - which is the stainless pans. 

And the things that aren't planned - like the lessons that my mom taught me by working beside her.  

And the sweet memories of a mom that will have to last me forever.

xoxo