Standing on His promises

Earlier this week I spent some time catching up on the blogs that I read on a semi-regular basis and came to a post about a young woman who was taken from this world at the age of 20.  In the incredible way that blog-land works the post linked to another post on the blog of the woman's sister and it was her post that I have spent most of this week thinking about and this morning I am left pondering the one question that has been on my heart since Tuesday.

What does it mean to 'leave everything' in order to follow God?

 'I tell you the truth,' Jesus replied, 'no one who has left home or brothers or sisters or mother or father or children or fields for me and the gospel will fail to receive a hundred times as much in this present age (homes, brothers, sisters, mothers, children and fields - and with them, persecutions) and in the age to come, eternal life.'

Mark 10:29-30

You see, nothing and I mean nothing, that God does is by accident and at some point prior to reading the second post God laid a specific ministry on my heart - one that for several months I have been adamantly saying 'Not this girl!  I'm waaaaayyyy too busy already.' 

In the early morning hours of Tuesday the specific ministry was heavy on my heart...in a different and more specific way than it has been previously.  In the past it has been in the form of 'somebody should do that.'  This week the thought was more along the lines of 'We' (TDM and I) are 'somebody'.  Hmmm.

As I worked my way through household chores Tuesday morning the thought hit me that if I wasn't working, if we weren't dependent on my income, that I would have more time to dedicate to that ministry and really any ministry that God opened the door to.  In effect, my primary role would be to be a 'missionary' in my own church and home.

I muddled through a bunch of thoughts, with various questions coming to mind - first of all, what would my husband think of all of these thoughts?  How would we afford specific things that really seem like non-negotiables that my income pays for?  What would serving in that capacity 'look' like as far as schedules and activities? 

Standing at the kitchen counter I asked God to confirm in some way for me that my thinking wasn't crazy on this and that the idea really had come from Him.

Later that day, having just arrived at work and seeing a computer screen for the first time all day, I checked my email and Facebook.  What I found stunned me!  A message from a good friend and honestly a mentor who, having just read my blog for the first time and knowing the struggle that I have felt about continuing to work while my kids are little, confirmed what God had planted that morning!

"Have you heard that old joke about the person on his roof in the flood waiting for God to rescue him? He turned down a boat and a helicopter while waiting for God. I started to realize that God was sending boats and helicopters and I was passing them up. It was definitely a leap of faith for {my husband} and I both, but I quit my job so I could continue serving at church and be the mom and wife I wanted to be."

(Note to my future self:  God never fails to amaze!)

So, here I am this morning, pondering what 'everything' is.  Is it health insurance?  Time with extended family?  Quiet times at home with just my girls?  Our second vehicle?  Cell phones?  Eating out?  New clothes?  All of these together or something completely different? 

If TDM and I choose this path, IF God is working in his heart the same as he is working in mine about this, there will be sacrifices and there will be persecution but God says 'a hundred times more'.  He also promises to provide our every NEED - whether it be food, medical care, shelter or just some down time. 

This morning I am standing on His promises ~ and trusting that He will lead us.